{"id":728,"date":"2023-12-01T09:49:07","date_gmt":"2023-12-01T17:49:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/seanmiller.us\/blog\/?p=728"},"modified":"2023-12-01T09:49:08","modified_gmt":"2023-12-01T17:49:08","slug":"confessions-chapter-34-v2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/seanmiller.us\/blog\/confessions-chapter-34-v2\/","title":{"rendered":"Confessions, Chapter 34 V2"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I’m closing in on finishing the second draft of Confessions of a Hallway Hustler<\/em>. My goal is to publish it this month.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Here’s a current version of the to-do\/punch list:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

To-dos V1<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

1. create outline
2. dictate story
3. transcribe dictations
4. expand scenes<\/s>
5. revision \u2014 2nd draft
6. revision \u2014 3rd draft (including punch list)
7. copyediting
8. design cover
9. layout interior of ebook
10. create & insert illustrations
11. publish on Kindle
12. Kindle free promotion + Bookbub ad campaign<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Punch list V1<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

1. describe the feeling of eating Snap\/Crackle for the first time
2. come up with new names for all the characters
3. come up with fun names for different types of candies & candy bars
4. have Anton use Chainy\u2019s password for something nefarious
5. high schoolers \u2014 Sideburns & Adam\u2019s Apple
6. kid has Hairy Squatter scar
7. names for energy drinks \u2014 Type II and Infarction
8. have Lopez playing with a magic kit when Anton meets him for the first time & when he meets Elvira \u2014 Lopez tries to get Elvira to be his assistant \u2014 she\u2019s dismissive
9. epigraph \u2014 \u201cI want to be a good guy. Really. But not yet.\u201d \u2014 St. Augustine
10. change Snap to Crackle
11. make Anton\u2019s vision his organization consistent \u2014 King? or something else \u2014 name his underlings accordingly \u2014 MAYBE military all the way \u2014 General Anton, lieutenants, soldiers
12. use https:\/\/hemingwayapp.com\/ to clean up prose, make sure grade level is below 6
13. after the shopping spree with Gina and the meeting with Jerry in C31, have Anton use a debit card for a purchase, allude to Jerry\u2019s laundering service
14. the locket Anton gives Elvira in C30 should have some (ironic, absurd) meaning to Anton \u2014 that Elvira doesn\u2019t get at all<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And here’s the second draft of Chapter 34:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I never noticed this before. If you get real quiet and listen with a sharp ear, you can hear the sound florescent lights make. If you block everything else out, you notice that they\u2019re loud. Really loud. They make this hissing sound.
No, it\u2019s more like a screeching. Florescent lights screech. At least the lights in Sosa\u2019s minimart were screeching. At me.
Sosa was oblivious, of course. He was lounging in his usual spot \u2014 on his makeshift throne in the back room. His lackeys and toadies were there too, draped on palettes stacked high with cases of Crackle, hanging onto his every word.
My guys waited for me outside in the alleyway.
\u201cAaaanton,\u201d Sosa began. He drew out the first syllable as if he were a parent scolding a child. \u201cCome over here. I want you meet some important people.\u201d He gestured to a guy holding a tablet like it was the control panel for a spaceship. \u201cMeet Derek, the guy who makes sure we never run out of Crackle.\u201d The glow of screen made his cheeks orange. He gave a nod, but didn\u2019t look up from the tablet, which he was stabbing with this thumb.
Sosa continued his introductions. He pointed to a girl who wearing purple camouflage fatigues and pair of mirrored sunglasses. \u201cThis is Carla. She’s the reason we’re never short on Infarction.\u201d Carla gave a salute. I was quite sure what to do, so I saluted back.
Then Sosa motioned to an older kid in the corner, who was dancing with a mop. \u201cThat’s Raj. Best driver in Jerburbia.\u201d
\u201cHe can drive?\u201d
\u201cYes. He got his license last week.\u201d
Raj gave dipped the mop and blew me a kiss.
I looked around to make sure the kiss was meant for me. I waved back.
And then, with a sweeping gesture, he pointed out a group of little kids in denim jumpsuits. They were swarming around the tallest palette in the room, trying to mount it. One kid was on top. As soon one of the others tried to join her, she\u2019d push them off. The oldest couldn\u2019t have been more than seven.
\u201cAnd these little ruffians are my cousins.\u201d
\u201cThey work for you?\u201d
\u201cIf you can call it that. I try to keep them busy. Once in a while, they get something done\u2026by accident.\u201d Sosa chuckled.
He looked at me and waited. He expected me to laugh at his joke. I gave the best imitation of mirth I could muster.
\u201cMostly, it\u2019s a favor to their folks. Keep them out of trouble. And out of their hair.\u201d He whacked me on the back.\u201cThe future\u2019s in good hands with this crew.\u201d
\u201cAbsolutely.\u201d
Suddenly, Sosa\u2019s expression grew serious. He leaned in, his normally booming voice dropping to a conspiratorial hush. \u201cThat\u2019s why I invited you here this afternoon. I know you\u2019re a busy guy. But I felt it was important.\u201d
\u201cI\u2019m always available to come see you, Sosa. You know that.\u201d
\u201cGood man.\u201d
\u201cSo what\u2019s on your mind.\u201d
\u201cThe future. Our future.\u201d
\u201cWhat about it?\u201d
\u201cIt\u2019s being threatened.\u201d
I straightened up. \u201cHow so?\u201d
\u201cThere’s this kid at your school, Anton.\u201d
\u201cWho is it?\u201d
\u201cHe goes my the handle \u2018Doc Matos\u2019.\u201d
\u201cThat kid!\u201d I blurted out. \u201cI know him. I mean, I\u2019ve heard of him. \u201d
\u201cUsually, I don\u2019t bother with the small fries. Not worth my trouble. But this kid, he\u2019s a trouble-maker. Got a big mouth. Likes to shoot it off in public. And people are starting to listen.\u201d
\u201cHe\u2019s a nobody. Nothing to worry about.\u201d
\u201cMaybe you\u2019re right, Anton.\u201d Sosa pulled out his phone, after a few taps, a video started to play. It was Doc Matos. He was standing on a footstool on the basketball court at school. A bunch of kids were gathered round him, listening with rapt attention. He was going on and on about the dark side of the candy world. I had to hand it to him. The guy had passion.
There was a barrel sitting beside him. Smoke rose from the opening on top of the barrel. Licks of flame darted out. Doc Matos called upon the crowd to toss their packets of Crackle into the barrel. Some of them did. Then more of them followed. In no time, they were pressing forward, tossing their Crackle into the barrel. The fire surged. Black smoke filled the video frame. You could practically smell the burnt sugar.
Sosa paused the video.\u201dMy crew\u2026no, my family. I think of them as my family. I do my best to take care of them. A lot of kids depend on me. And they have families too. Families they need to take care of.\u201d Sosa slipped the phone back into his fanny pack. \u201cThis kid is bad for business.\u201d
\u201cAgreed. One hundred percent. So\u2026what’s the plan?\u201d
Sosa’s eyes had that glint I’d come to recognize. \u201cI need you to make sure he stops\u2026talking.\u201d
\u201cSure, Sosa. No problem.\u201d
I hadn\u2019t noticed, but Sosa\u2019s lieutenant, The Shadow, had been behind us this whole time. Sosa wrapped his arm around him. \u201cI want my associate to go with you. He\u2019s got certain skills I think you\u2019ll find useful.\u201d
\u201cThat\u2019s okay, Sosa. I have my own guys. I trust them.\u201d
\u201cI insist,\u201d Sosa said.
It was clear the matter wasn\u2019t up for debate. I was stuck with this kid until the job was done. Whatever that was.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I’m closing in on finishing the second draft of Confessions of a Hallway Hustler. My goal is to publish it this month. Here’s a current version of the to-do\/punch list: To-dos V1 1. create outline2. dictate story3. transcribe dictations4. expand scenes5. revision \u2014 2nd draft6. revision \u2014 3rd draft (including punch list)7. copyediting8. design cover9. … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-728","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-process","no-featured-image-padding"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/seanmiller.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/728","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/seanmiller.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/seanmiller.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/seanmiller.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/seanmiller.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=728"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/seanmiller.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/728\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":729,"href":"https:\/\/seanmiller.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/728\/revisions\/729"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/seanmiller.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=728"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/seanmiller.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=728"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/seanmiller.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=728"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}